seven things

No, I'm not referring to the Miley Cyrus song, you all. I'm referring to seven things you should know before reading any further in this here blog of mine.

1) This is a drama free zone. You can take your one eyed, three legged drama dog and her liter of illegitimate puppies, and leave them at the door.

2) By reading this blog you may find out things about me that you may not like because I'm done hiding, ya know? So, here's my advice to you if you read something you don't like or find out something about me that you don't like I don't give a rat's fucking ass. I am who I am and that's all that I am. So, if you don't like it then scram. See, that big X up there in the upper right corner of this window well it was made for a reason. Use it.

3) I have an unhealthy habit of talking about things that may gross you out such as poop, yeast infections, gas, sex, masturbation, and you know bodily functions and malfunctions. Yes, really deep inside I'm twelve and I'm okay with that. If these things, gross you out then I apologize. However, to save the eyes of some of you who may not want to read about sexual things I'll be sure to warn you before something gets too sexually intimate. I'm nice like that.

4) This is just my side of the story, ya know? It's not my boyfriend's side of the story, my mom's side of the story, your mom's side of the story, or Bill Clinton's side of the story. It is my side of the story. Therefore, don't start judging the people involved in my little blog posts unless you personally know their side of the story. If you want to accuse my boyfriend of being emotionally abusive, talk shit about my friends, or what have you then have fun w/ that because we know the truth and your opinion stinks worse than the fart I just let. And trust me my farts could peel the paint off your walls tonight.

5) I am selfish, bitchy, and I whine a lot. I'm the youngest of a family of four, the only girl, and deep down a spoiled rotten princess. I know all of this and I'm working on all of this. Therefore, your telling me that you don't want to hear me bitch or I'm being selfish, spoiled, or sound like I'm throwing a temper tantrum is not imperative to me. I know this and I'm working on it, ya know?

6) I'm also lazy and I know that as well, so nothing new if you want to point that out either.

7) Most importantly this is my blog and I'm a smart ass, constantly changing, crazy, fun broad. If you remember the above things then we'll get along just fine. However, if you don't remember those things let me just say I have a horrible temper and you don't want to see that side of me. Just ask my boyfriend he knows all about it.

Anyway, this is my new home on the 'net. I ain't totally sure what I'm doing w/ it. However, I'm done hiding. I'm done playing games. I'm done with the bullshit. And I just am gonna be me. Take it or leave it.